effusive beginning
silence in the absence -- this isolation keen and well kept
weep--emotional stint
felt like a whip to the back(hand) of dis[soul]ution--

gray night gray matter gray sight
follows
the connection strong
vibrant and empty
the physical prowess removed
grown stronger the absence
the hum of dark house ringing through the ears
listening with ears to the ground
to the door
the floor giving a signal of
coming plight
urgency
--speak about peace
peach and fur electric eclectic touch
from everywhere a beginning a forgetting
sucking in the brave air trying to be braver still
and poetry is at standstill
human bondage
the torture of observation
knowing human disadvantage
isn't found in stillness
but movement and thought
thinking that we are whole
centered and kind gentle sensical beings--
reality the bitch next door
divided our efforts, thoughts askew
separate living and breathing only self
others an illusion
caring too much
too much the sins--right wrong
dialogical process
conversation with no one but
self--diminished
damned
and reaching every reaching
for salvation
living across the corridor
and weeping
about howthingsusedtobe
and weeping
about howthingswere
and weeping
about nothinginparticular
until
s t o p
sudden shrinking self
the world so big so big so big big big
tiny little self shrinking
in the night
under stars and magnolia trees next to giant city blocks and rivers
muddy rivers were death and carriage both reside

polyester suited man on the corner
preaching his sign
saying god is a badass
and we're fucked
with his loud speaker
and small eyes
praying for eternal damnation

while pedestrians walk
walk like death is something known but left
alone
under the magnolia trees by the cobbled brick street
the street light singing shinning through the water the rain
the best part of life spent in front of a stop light
waiting
thinking that some missing piece is about to jump out
SURPRISE
with an answer
to solitude in a crowded bar
judgement
snowy white judgement
soot
the black soot of conclusion
illusion
sophisticated inclination
that something
is not
quite
right
signpost--the signal to leave-takings